Whew! This morning I'm able to take some time to just breathe. The past several days have been long and full and physically and spiritually exhausting! It is throughout periods like the past week or so that I am so very grateful for the gift of our Savior.
I posted devotions at Worship for the Weekday both yesterday and this morning. I didn't remember the content of my earlier post so I reread it this morning. I rather chuckled to myself that I rely upon, ardently beg for the peace of, earnestly seek the wisdom of a Savior who is both a 'righteous branch' and the 'light of the world.' The chuckling is not because of the silliness of it, but rather because of the reminder that I am prone to take myself and my little life way too seriously--that's what is so silly!
Of course, those who know me will say, "Well, Mary, that isn't news!" So there, my 'great thorn' has been revealed! I don't know what Paul's was, but I suspect he struggled with self-importance from time to time too. Of course my 20/20 hindsight informs me that my days, long though they were, would have been less tiring had I rested more in God and relied less upon myself. My stress level would have been dramatically reduced had I laid my tasks, duties and responsibilities at the foot of the Cross rather than owning them as my own and mine alone.
I am ever amazed that after my long hiatus from posting devotions that God lovingly still meets me to impart a word of knowledge for my own application as well as to share with others. I am ever humbled that He continues to use me as a messenger. I need to remember more often that the message is not mine, but His. The responsibility for how it is received then, becomes not my concern--which I guess is part of my angst. It's not about me! I am committing to repeat this 4-word mantra often throughout the day -- at least every waking hour on the hour. I'll keep you posted about how that works out!
Of course, all stress is not necessarily 'bad' stress. Some of my latest experience is about a blessing! It's a blessing along the line of Jabez from the Old Testament. I posted a devotion about Jabez a couple of years ago on August 30. There must be something about this time of year! Anyway, one of my Jabez blessings has been that I am working every free minute doing free lance administrative and writing work!
This, of course, is what I love to do and I am enjoying it very much - the best of both worlds because I can say "no" if I don't want or don't have time for a project and still continue to receive offers for work! The extra income has been a Godsend to us, literally. Anyway, as you can imagine, I've had to work to figure out how the extra time fits into our life. I have a better handle on that now and feel a bit more like I'm getting in the flow of things. I have no doubt that my continual recitation of my new mantra will alleviate any unhealthly attitude that may creep in from time to time:-)
Speaking of work, I need to get going on my latest project assignment so I'll sign off for now.