We are each designed for a unique and divine purpose. Live yours!

Monday, April 12, 2010

Woman with the alabaster jar

"When a woman who had lived a sinful life in that town learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee's house, she brought an alabaster jar of perfume, and as she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them" (Luke 7:37-38 NIV).

I decided some time ago that name of my next book would be "Woman With The Alabaster Jar." Well . . . I was directed to that title by promptings from the Holy Spirit. I love this parable so much. It is a sad, yet triumphant tale!

As I have identified with the Woman at the Well, I identify with this woman. God has been doing some deep, hard work in me over the last several years. He has taken me some places I would have preferred not to go. There has been some darkness and heaviness that I wasn't sure at times I would find my way through. I didn't realize until this past weekend - when I had a huge epiphany and vision for my next book just how dark and heavy those years were.

Oh my! We had so much joy and celebration as well! More than I ever dreamed! Both of our children graduated from high school. Our daughter left for college and graduated from George Mason. There she met the wonderful young man who became her husband.

Our son attended J. S. Reynolds and then went off to Woodrow Wilson Rehab Center near Staunton for Life Skills and Job Training. He has just started a job at Kroger and his future is looking bright.

There, of course, has been much more to celebrate and we anticipate an abundance of gladness and joy in the years to come. But the joy, for me was underscored by a terrible searing pain -- the pain of relinquishing two most precious human beings -- my children -- to the world. I despised it and protested it. And yes, I railed at God sometimes.

Today I can look back with the wisdom that only hindsight and introspection and a huge dose of grace affords. I see God's handiwork in every letting go and giving away. I see His imprint on the hearts of my two beautiful children -- now grown into incredible adults.

This past weekend I became this woman - one who had poured out all she had and all she was at the feet of the Savior. I am no longer able or willing to cling so tightly to the things of this world, I relinquished them all.

I feel drained from the experience. I feel strangely light as well, though. I feel almost glowing as I experience at a new and deeper level the freedom that is afforded one who has nothing left to give up, and so nothing left to hold back. It is an incredible sensation: to be touched so intimately by God. It is an unspeakable place to be standing: in the eye of God's desire and promise and plan.

I'm looking forward to what each day will bring me and to answer God call more completely as I share what I have learned: that we can only become full and complete, whole and perfect when we release our own will into His divinely designed plan for our lives.

I hope you'll check back often to follow as my next book is completed and I begin to process and translate the lessons that are being poured into this sinful, simple woman's heart and mind.

Blessings on your journey,


Andrea said...

AMEN!! GOD is most certainly continuing to use you.
Blessings, hugs, and lots of prayers, andrea

Nikki (Sarah) said...

congrats on your new book and yes I will watch for it. Stay strong Mary.

Unknown said...

Glory to God! I can't wait for your next book as well. Stay strong and prayful.

Cheesemakin' Mamma said...

I love these moments. They are incredible! They happen to me every so often. Like you, they leave me feeling drained but elated.