There was a time when I could easily slip into a place of God's perfect and all-surpassing peace whenever life got too complicated or challenging -- or even just because I savored the sacred time with my Savior. That is where I could right myself and go back to my life with renewed energy, assurance and hope.
Life these days is so complicated - and I have drifted far from my intentional seeking and succumbed to my need to "be in charge" of my life and of situations around me. Silly me! I know I have NO control on any level. I realize there is a direct link between this fact and my lack of peace and calm within my being and surrounding me lately.
Sunday night I tossed and turned and could not shut my mind off even with ardent and continual prayer. It was a spiritual battle that left me drained and defeated. But in the morning, as my anxiety level rose and my mind continued to race, God stepped in and released me from my battle! Surrender is a powerful and glorious thing! I told myself that "its going to be okay." Words straight from heaven certainly, because I had no capacity to think it, let alone speak it out loud or believe it!
I instantly felt an odd sense of empowerment - which is what I thought at the time. What I now realize it that it was a sense of freedom! God stepped in and took back His rightful place as ruler of my life -- because I allowed it! He was with me all through that night - battling my own sinful inclinations and pushing back every time I insisted on being in charge.
No, the issues and problems and questions I still struggle with have not gone away. What has changed though, is that I have a renewed strength--physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I let go and let God! And the all-surpassing peace is blanketing me (though I do have a proclivity to "kick the covers off")!
I slept better last night, though still remnants of my flawed, stubborn humanity tried to rob me of my hard-won peace. This morning I feel renewed again and even stronger, though still tired. My humility took a huge hit! It's back in its proper place -- at the forefront of everything I do, think, say, believe.
Thank you dear, sweet Lord for loving me even when I am the most unlovable! I pray you will turn over whatever you are dealing with in your life to our Heavenly Father who wants nothing more -- or less -- than our well-being and our praise!
Blessings on your journey,